Monday, September 9, 2013

Pixelated Love

Have you ever experienced the feeling when someone is madly in love with you? That person is so into you, but you always cold-shouldered that person. You sure liked the attention that was thrown at you, but didn't show it out. You sure wanted to reciprocate, but restrained. You sure wanted to give in, but held back. Yes? Happens often. At this point, the love that person is feeling for you is like the picture taken from a high definition D-SLR. Crystal clear, great picture quality. But as days and months pass by with the same behaviour, eventually the quality of the picture diminishes. By the time you realize that you need to react or risk losing out on that person, the unending love that was shown towards you has almost faded away into obscurity. The image by now has complete lost clarity in thought, that it now looks completely pixelated. This is what I would term Pixelated Love, the love that was lost by the misuse of the sensor on your lens.

Monday, July 29, 2013

Footballing lessons

1) Sign your first professional contract at 16
2) Break into the first team at 18
3) Score your first goal at 19
4) Become a fan favourite at 20
5) You are the backbone of the team at 23
6) The players adore you, the fans love you
7) Given the captaincy at 25
8) Whole club revolves around you
9) You are 27, 11 years at the club now
10) Still no trophy, somewhere deep down it plays on your mind
11) Suddenly out of the blue from nowhere, you have a suitor
12) Someone has seen you and liked you
13) They are hell bent on signing you
14) Do everything in their capacity to make you feel more wanted than the place you currently are in
15) You are hesitant and don't want to give it. Keep an arms distance
16) But you are tempted. The trophy. The money. By it all
17) Your fans realize you are flirting with danger. Your players advise you not to get carried away
18) You push them all away and slowly get sucked in
19) You get the feel you are doing the right thing
20) Finally, you make the move against everyone's wishes
21) Just because you were blinded by the love showered by your suitor
22) By the importance given to you. The money. The promise of trophies
23) By the time you settle in, you realize your suitor already has formed a good team himself
24) The importance for you from the suitor has suddenly vanished
25) You are left shocked. Nowhere to go. Nowhere to hide. Left in the middle of nowhere
26) Now you are trying hard to cement your place in the new team
27) Your suitor though has lost interest in you and you are benched
28) The trophy. The money. Its all vanishing thick and fast
29) Your suitor just wants to get rid of you. You are still confused where it all went wrong
30) Your whole world has come down crashing
31) Those loving fans. Those awesome team mates. No one wants you back
32) You were probably greedy. You were probably just ambitious
33) But you still don't know where it all went wrong with the new team
34) You wish you know it someday
35) You wish you could set your career back all right someday
You wish you never had to see the 50 shades of a grey

As my coach always said
"In the journey of life many come and go, But there are a few whom you never want to let go"

Sunday, November 13, 2011

"When are you leaving Capgemini??"

I always dreaded this day, when I will finally have to draft this farewell mail. After successfully completing 50 months with Capgemini, SBALAN and 11520 are soon going to become history.
From the day I first stepped into the office as a campus recruit 4 years back to the day when I am going to step out of the office one last time, this journey has been one hell of a roller coaster ride.
I decided the time was right to move on in the pursuit of my dream and to achieve that I had to finally break this ever so strong relationship with Capgemini and the IT industry.
From the initial training period, breaking the record for the most days on bench, hours spent in cafeteria and pantry, SAP TechEd creative team, Active Reuse, Kellogg, Brookshires, Treasure hunts, Winning Quizzes, Cubicle Decorations, Winning every single internal football tournament with the SAP UNITED team, captaining the company football team, Dancing away to glory on Fundoo Friday’s and Jashn’s, Innumerable trips all over South India with the office gang, non-stop fun on the floor every single day and the lovely people who made this journey a memorable one, going to miss every single one of these. Capgemini for me has been much more than just a work place. It has been a second home.
The corporate world has taught me a lot in my stay here both professionally and personally and the education that I have garnered here in the past few years will hold me in good stead for all my future endeavours.
I would like to express my gratitude to all the people I have been involved with in my tenure here. Right from the first day I was made to feel at home, whether it was by a P1 or M4. My stay would not have been the same without all you guys. Every moment spent with you will be cherished for a lifetime. A whole hearted thank you to every single one of you.
Sport has always been my first love and it has been an open secret to you all. So I am taking the plunge into the world of Sports Management and hopefully with all your blessings will become a somebody someday soon in the sporting industry.
It was a very small world out there already and thanks to all the social networking sites, the world has become even smaller now. I am all over the internet, so do keep in touch J
PS: And finally, the subject line of this mail is dedicated to all those people who have bombarded me with this question from a long time now J YES, today is the day when I am finally leaving Capgemini and I am leaving with a very heavy heart. Honoured to have started and ended my IT career with Capgemini.

Back to student life...

Been more than a year since the last post. Life has drastically changed in the meantime. Salary does not get credited anymore on the last day of every month nor do I wear formals everyday of the week. Don't get to swipe my access card at the entrance nor have to go through a security check everyday. No more unlimited free coffee nor the endless office gossip. Four years of a one of a kind experience finally came to an end. An end which surely is the start of a new beginning. Was in no ways an easy decision to make but when taken, a satisfactory one it was. I am no more a corporate. I am a student now. A student in Mumbai. A student pursuing a post graduation. A Sports Management student :) The first step in pursuit of happiness...

Monday, September 13, 2010

For the heck of it.....

Very sleepy.. or probably i am just not able to find enough time wher i can completely focus and do justice to what i actually write.....
The amavasaya story...
The why act so different, in the company of HER...
The STUD...
All coming shortly............

Monday, April 19, 2010

Posting from work is fun ;)

Posting from office for the very first time... and to tell you i am super bugged at this point of time :) Somehow there seem to be no interest to do anything at all, and this damn new project does not seem to kick off either. Only sports website i am able to log into these days is mirror football and i am really not impressed with the articles written there by people like Collymore and Defoe. Wonder how these people get paid for writing shit more often than not, I could do more justice even though my writing skills are not extraordinary. So its becoming that much more difficult to kill time. Just picked up my third black tea for the day and that seems to be the first thing i do of every time i get really restless, other than logging onto facebook on my mobile and wait and wait for someone to update something interesting so that i can kill some time commenting on that. Have become a freaking addict. Actually addict is a understatement. And as i take another sip of tea from my glass now i am wondering what more i can type on this post.
Getting tempted to get into the cagea n kill some time with the brothers watching some videos on footytube and youtube, might succumb to the pressure of restlessness soon and go there and stop wilsa from WORKING and hijack his comp.
And as i am typing this post wondering why the day is so borin and devoid of any sort of activity. Lots of things pop up ;) Have a project related discussion with my team lead after a long time, even though it was a very small one. Probably the first in three weeks ;) Then get a mail from "MY BEST FREN" that its his last working day in office today.. Didnt see that one coming. Now my football team is down to the bare bones ;) and 9n takes a dig at him with a reply to his mail thanking him for his immense contributution to the team. Loved the "Bulet like toe poke" comment though :P
Also a good old friend wanted the phone number of his long lost crush which he thought i would be able to find using my networking capabiliteis. Did my first round of search on the social networking sites, and the result was negative. Actually even i echo his sentiments. Its very nice to talk to some girl now when your conversational capabalities with the opposite sex has increased hundred folds over the last 5 to 6 years :) Never had the balls to do that in school. If you had a crush on a girl, all you do is follow her everywher she goes, stare at her in the corridors, ask about her to all her damn friends but never talk to her. Man... I have had the true satisfication of talking to one such girl a few years back ;) So will try and make sure this guy feels that too..
Lots of new faces on the floor. The fresh recruits from colleges have finally hit the floor. Didnt find anything really good looking there, but some of them are pretty decent look wise. Have not yet got the chance to interact yet :P
So as it stands, Date and ST coupled with Sister are still on top of the list on the floor ;)
Another hour and then can go for the evening snack and kill another hour on top. Cant wait now for it to become 6. The restlessness is getting on my nerves now. Guess its time for another tea :D
Finding it slightly difficult to sit here and type all this cos every jack on the floor who has to go to the loo has to cross my cubicle and will surely play peeping tom.. and i am havin to do a JPD every now and then to look over my shoulder to see who's behind. This sad seat that i've got. Have you heard of a LOO view seat yet, thats exactly what i've got at work :(
Will try to do whatever justice i can with these updates straight from work. Seems to be fun. Its just like making out in a public place. You are always scared that someone wil just pop by and ask you what you are doing, but you do this just for that extra thrill and so that it increases the pleasure :P
Signing off now.. Hope to make this a more regular habit...

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Official Theme - World Cup 2010

Something inspirational had to happen for me to push myself to write my next post, and it just happened now :)
I am not at all a music freak. So for me to fall completely heads over in love with a song, it had to be something remarkable and exceptional. And this one truly is mind blowing. The tune, the rhythm and to top it all.. The Lyrics... Touches your heart. Makes you feel for the people of africa.
Such a wonderful song as the Theme for this year's World Cup in South Africa. Thanks to Keinan Abdi Warsame alais K'NAAN for coming up with something special like this. Have been listening to it from the last two hours nonstop again and again and again and even when writing this post :)
Really want an African team to win this years world cup now :) Cant just wait for june now.

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

Born to a throne, stronger than Rome
But Violent prone, poor people zone
But it’s my home, all I have known
Where I got grown, streets we would roam
But out of the darkness, I came the farthest
Among the hardest survival
Learn from these streets, it can be bleak
Except no defeat, surrender retreat

So we struggling, fighting to eat and
We wondering when we’ll be free
So we patiently wait, for that fateful day
It’s not far away, so for now we say

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

So many wars, settling scores
Bringing us promises, leaving us poor
I heard them say, love is the way
Love is the answer, that’s what they say,
But look how they treat us, make us believers
We fight their battles, then they deceive us
Try to control us, they couldn’t hold us
Cause we just move forward like Buffalo Soldiers

But we struggling, fighting to eat
And we wondering, when we’ll be free
So we patiently wait, for that faithful day
It’s not far away, but for now we say

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

(Ohhhh Ohhhh Ohhhhh Ohhhh)
And everybody will be singing it
(Ohhhh Ohhhh Ohhhhh Ohhhh)
And you and I will be singing it
(Ohhhh Ohhhh Ohhhhh Ohhhh)
And we all will be singing it
(Ohhh Ohh Ohh Ohh)

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

When I get older, I will be stronger
They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag
And then it goes back, and then it goes back
And then it goes back

When I get older, when I get older
I will be stronger, just like a Waving Flag
Just like a Waving Flag, just like a Waving flag
Flag, flag, Just like a Waving Flag.

Friday, December 11, 2009

heart broken :( Really???

I really don't know if i liked her so much or if i had fallen in love with her.. I had just met her two or three times personally before.. Have spoken to her over phone on a few occasions but nothing so intimate that i could end up getting swept off my feet.. All i got in return during my conversations was being called "The biggest flirt she'd ever encountered", which i personally don't think i am :)
But there was something about her.. Probably the fact that she was a malayali.. This factor according to me was the main culprit.. For the first time in my life.. I had thought about marriage.. I had seen a girl now in my life, whom i could probably go ahead and get married to. Never felt this feeling for anyone before her. I really dont know how to put it all together cos i am pretty sure i was never really in love with her, but i did want to marry her if that could be made a reality.
Eventually when i did tell her that i want to marry her, she just laughed it off as a joke :( I asked her not to jump the gun and get married immediately and pleaded to give me a year or two's time. But all i could hear at the other end of the phone is laughter. Nobody really takes me seriously when i tell them i like them, do they??
Those few moments together when i gave her a red rose, shared a glass of red wine and dedicated "Nothing's gonna change my love for u" for her will remain the most memorable moment i spent with her and the very last time i met her :)
And after a month or two i get a call from her telling she's getting married to this so and so malayali bugger from KERALA(somehow cant stand these kerala born and bought up malayali GUYS now settled in bangalore. Come on dude, bangalore gals just dont suit ur taste and lifestyle. When are u ever gonna realize that and start marrying gals from kerala??).
No i did not get depressed when i heard that. For a matter of fact it didnt even take a few days for me to get over her and move on in life. But i just could not take myself to go and attend her wedding and have to look at that damning sight of someone else in a position where you wanted to be in. But i made that clear to her when she invited me for her wedding. She thought i was acting cocky but when are these gals ever gonna understand that we guys too have a heart and that heart too has feelings ;)
So the first girl whom Sandy really thought about marrying will be officially someone else's wife today. So all the very best to the two of you and wishing you a happy married life(Honestly after feedback from all my dear and near ones i've come to the conclusion that he actually looks like your younger brother when both of u stand together or probably i am just jealous)
As they say, just before my last few moments in this world.. When my entire life flashes in front of me.. Among all the happiness and sorrow and family and friends and wife and kids and football and basketball and trophies and accolades and success and failures, there probably will be a split second where your image too flashes by.. But mind you.. Just a split second!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Bees saal baad :)

To be updated soon.. gotta get my comp repaired first and then update :)

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Nokia N79 :)

Got my new N79 a week ago :) By new this time i mean it is brand new, unlike the three month old "new phone" i bought the last time around. Has almost all the features of my previous N82 except for the Xenon flash. Has a 5MP camera, a good music player with an FM transmitter, 4GB memory card with the phone with an additional 4GB card with preloaded movies free, GPS with the nokia maps and three months of voice guided service free, n-gage games and loads of other features. Also has local language messaging, Oxford dictionary and an SMS reader. Sleeker and lighter than the 82 and also has a better look . Came with two additional changable panels also. All in all a good bargain for 15k and after i somehow managed to get 5.4k for my water-logged always screwed N82, this new phone was a super deal for 9k after i got a further 5% discount on my card. A bit delicate and needs to be handled with care. Other than that, really starting to love the phone. Guess rain gods also cannot disrupt our lives this time, since i've completely insured it against all sorts of damages :P Looking forward to a healthy longlasting realtionship with my new partner in crime ;)

For complete specification please visit:

http://www.nokia.co.in/find-products/products/nokia-n79/tech-specs
http://www.gsmarena.com/nokia_n79-2497.php
http://www.fonearena.com/nokia-n79_712.html

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Season Ahead - A Preview :)

An amazing start to this season for my team. Never did i think that they'll beat Everton, that too away from home so convincingly. 6-1 is a super scoreline to start any season for any team. Loved the way they played. Each individual showed a lot more maturity than the previous year. They looked stronger and played better as a team. 4-3-3 seems to be working just fine for us. Somehow when all the odds are against us and critics lamblasting you all the away, Arsene somehow manages to prove that wrong. Playing beautiful football always, treat to watch them play even for every neutral fan. The only thing missing is silverware, hope i don have to wait too long for that now. Keeping fingers crossed. If this form does continue there will be no stopping Arsenal. I just hope they sustain the momentum they've achieved after this match and keep going from strength to strength. They played brilliantly in the first half of 2007-08 season when the title was within their reach and threw it all away in the second half of the season. They played pathetic in the first half of 2008-09 season, but finished the season off with a 21 match unbeaten streak. Just wish the 2009-10 season is lucky for us and we perform both before and after christmas :) Then its gonna be an absolute carnival at the emirates come may ;)

Coming to the team now. There is a lot of talk about Arsene not buying new EXPERIENCED players even though he has loads of money now after selling two "big" players for a massive profit. But after what we saw in the pre season and on the first week, they look pretty good. But reinforcements in certain areas might probably add more depth to the squad and make what could be a good season into a great season. Almunia to me looks good on goal. No complaints. Clichy and Sagna to me are perfect as full backs with Eboue, Traore, Gibbs and Silvestre(i am still personally not impressed by him) as backups. Galls and Vermaelen look good in defence and what is required out of them is consistantly good performances. The one thing they lack is height. So get Hangeland from fulham after selling Senderos to Everton :)
Midfield and the attack is still our strength. We will continue to score and entertain the crowd whoever our opponents are. Fab looked fabolous in the opening game. Loved his tribute to Daniel Jarque after he scored. Still wondering how footballers who are so fit, suffer heart attaks at the age of only 26. Song seems an immensely improved player. Denilson still for me is the weak link. Get Patric Vieira to guide the kids and we might just become unplayable against ;) But i dont think that transfet will come through, would have loved to see Vieira again at Arsenal though. Then there are Nasri, Diaby, Rosicky, Walcott, Ramsey and a host of young kids who impressed like Wilshire and Merida.
Looks a very good midfield to me. Attack looks strong too. They seem to be taking their chances, trying long range shots, putting lots of crosses into the box and basically score goals from all parts of the field rather than trying to walk the ball into the goal. Bendtner looks vastly improved from last season and if he keeps his head a bit and plays smart football, he'l definitely be a player to watch out for. Van persie is excellent on his days and ordinary the others. He's coming off a wonderful last season and you can expect lots of fireworks from him. And Arshiavin to me is truly worldclass. The performance last season in Anfield proved that and he sure will be a wizard with the ball creating numerous chances and scoring a lot of goals. We have Eduardo back and when he's back to full fitness i bet there is no better finisher in EPL than him. He was true class untill that horific tackle from taylor broke his leg. Would love to see him play a lot more and score plenty this season :) And to finish it all there's Vela who also seems a bundle of talent waiting to explode any minute at the biggest stage.
And now talking about the departures from emirates this season. Was slightly disappointed when Toure left cos he was the last of the invincibles left and he was a great player for us for seven seasons. But he too was past his prime and wanted to go away, so 16 million for him was a good piece of business. But what according to me was a better piece of business by Wenger was getting 25 million for Abebayor. I so hate him these days. Started to hate him when he made that famous statement a year back that "if i have to play like henry, pay me like henry". Son, please do not dare compare yourself with King Henry, you are just plain insulting him cos if you even play 20 seasons with arsenal you wont do half as much as henry did for us. I know you were a key player to us till a year back, but after what you showed us on the pitch the whole of last season with your lack of interest or rather laziness and how you wanted to run off to any other club that pays you more, we just dont want you here anymore. There wont be a single fan all over the world unhappy about your departure from the club. And it was only you who bought about this situation to yourself. You wanted more money and now you've got it. Now i shall wait and watch what you gonna do at Man City cos i so bloody wanna see you flop that bad that Mark Hughes finally loans you off to some Championship club :P You know wat... We would never have scored six goals had you been playing up front for us against Everton. So thanks a ton for leaving. God bless you.

All in all looks a promising start to a promising season. Just hoping i will be rejoicing nine months from now, reading this blog. The only thing thats the biggest worry for arsenal is INJURIES. Somehow if the playes manage to finish the seasn without major injuries at crucial times, i am so sure we will be the favourites to win the title. I just hope the injury curse just goes away this season cos i really badly want the title this season. And as i type this post, just read a report that Fabregas, Denilson, Sagna and Walcott are all injured ahead of our crucial Champions league qualifier against Celtic tomorrow :( Somehow luck always deserts us, and i so wish that lady luck finally smiles on us this season :)

In Arsene we trust. Gunner for life :)

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

High time you wake up!!!

I think the title sums it all. Have sat on my ass n screwed around long enough. All I've done is take two steps back for every step forward that I've taken in the last two years. Should i give CAT?? Should i get into sports management?? Should i slit my own throat?? But wat the fuck.. how can i do all this.. I have an education loan to pay off na.. How can i even think of doing anything else until that is done with... Now i say.. Balls to that education loan... Think of something quick and make something happen, rather than sit and talk n talk n talk(just like i am doing in this post, all charged up at 2 in the nite one day and two days later everything is conveniently forgotten)... You can sit and plan about your future for the rest of your life, but until you start actually doing anything about it nothing is really gonna happen. I bloody really hate it these days.. Cant make yourself focus on a single thing in life... and when u reach that point, it really really gets frustrating. Sometimes you think atleast the company should have fired you from the job, atleast then will you do something seriously. But again if that happens, who's gonna give you that 20,000 bucks that you so rely on these days. man... The day you make yourself understand that probably to gain something and make some progress to your presently stagnant life, you gotta make some sacrifices. Only then will you make your first positive step forward. The faster that day arrives, the better. Untill then the frustrating life will continue.............